Dark carvern chat - Internet dating first phone call

The man you are speaking to is trying to decide if he’d like to date you.

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Many of my dating coaching clients have questions about what to ask during the first phone call. Understandably, most busy midlife women say they don’t have time to waste on the wrong men.

What I have found over the past 10 years as a dating coach, and from my own journey to find my own husband, this can be trickier than you think.

As hearing each others’ voices is also a whole new level of discovering more about each other, it is also often a key point for deciding that you don’t want to take things further, or for a potential partner to decide the same about you; this is the first time that you have a live interaction with them, and this tells you a lot. There’s an argument for speaking as soon as one or two emails have established that you’ve something in common – not least because the phone call very often tips one or both of you to end the connection, so talking sooner rather than later means you don’t waste time on non-starters.

On the other hand, if you have a number of email connections, you may want to be choosey about who you talk with.

Six to ten email exchanges (3-5 from each of you) is a good rule of thumb.


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